i wish starbucks made bloody marys
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
