he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
