I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
