so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Randomize
