Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
