super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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