The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
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