i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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