so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Randomize
