The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
