thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Randomize
