their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
