If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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