Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
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