how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
