5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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