I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Randomize
