): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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