In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
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