yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
