just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
