Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Randomize