new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
