Where did you get a picture of my penis
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
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