she looked like the bat from fern gully.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Its about making memories worth repressing
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize
