i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
