she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
