why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize