This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
