I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
