His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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