I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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