I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
