ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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