Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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