the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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