party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
