The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
