Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
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