He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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