Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
