now i know why i became what i already was.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
