i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Randomize
