hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
