He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize