we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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