You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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