Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize