i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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