last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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